I read an online news article this weekend that posed the posit ‘Is the War In Iraq Over Oil?’. Wow. Way to catch up to the year 2003, jerk-ass.

What chaps my ass, metaphorically, is the inherent assumption in that article that some people DON’T think that it’s all a fight for oil. Is there really a culture of living, breathing citizens of our Empire who are convinced that we are in Iraq to grant the citizenry freedom?

WE aren’t even free, and it’s our fucking country!

What is the logic of these chaw-smelling mouth breathers? Are they convinced that we decided one day to put forth an effort that costs this country $5,000.00 a SECOND because we woke up and realized that Iraq need our help? I’m sorry to burst the collective spit bubbles that are forming in their slack-jawed mouths, but America is not a humanitarian country. As charity goes, we’re politically a country of assholes that don’t do anything for anyone whose citizenship doesn’t start with the word “Ameri” and ends with “Can”. We’re just not that nice. Look it up!

We torture people for information! That’s stuff BAD GUYS do! CONNECT THE DOTS!

We will not restrict capitalism, tobacco, religion, or politics because, God Damn it, there’s a dollar to be made with them. This government will, in accordance with tradition, watch its’ populations starve and wither from disease, leaving its’ children to rot in the streets and die in mad scrambles for sustenance and shelter to protect money. Money. Hey! Oil costs money! Am I… am I making sense here?

And it’s not just about money. Noooooo….. it’s about OIL money, America’s royal bloodline! The Oil families are the young country’s newest royalty. They are generations of king makers and regime breakers. But whenever someone mentions this, the slack jaws throw a new curse word at ‘em. Liberal.

Think I’m just a belly aching ‘Liberal’? Let’s look into it shall we? $5,000.00 dollars a second. A SECOND! If we poured $5,000.00 dollars a second into our internal problems and invested this enormous sum domestically, do you know what we could accomplish?

Flying fucking cars. I’m not kidding.

For $5,000.00/sec, we could equip every single American with a flying car. Shit, it would probably be a flying car that DOESN’T run on gasoline. Don’t want a flying car? You’re a fag! But even if you don’t want a flying car, there is lots that a government could do with $5,000.00 dollars a second!

Shore up the borders… with high tech devices!

Kill every spider in the whole fucking world.

Build an entire city made out of Twin Towers.

Feed the hungry. I mean EVERY hungry… everywhere in the world.

Teach fish to dance.

Teach our children to think.

Teach our adults to think.

Build a water engine… and a solar engine… and a wind powered engine… and a non polluting detergent… and probably have enough left over to cure a lot of forms of cancer.

Play this game at home! What do you think we could accomplish if we spent 5 grand a second for five years? Besides conquering a backwater nation by rushing headlong into it with out a plan or proper preparing. You know… besides that.

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