Dean and Debbie invited me out to the Houston Livestock Show & Rodeo the other day. I graciously declined the kind-hearted invitation, and Dean inquired as to whether or not I enjoy the rodeo. I said that if the word unjoy existed, that would be the term I would use to describe my experience at the rodeo. D'you know why? It's 'cause it's a fucking rodeo.

I DID enjoy the rodeo when I was a kid and won free tickets from the local radio station to attend. Mind you, these were the salad days of my youth, before I picked up the sheen of contempt that I use to reflect back the idiotic image of the world as I see it. My father and I went to go see Julio Iglesias. That's right! I said it! The tickets were free.

Quit judging me.

The spectacle was enjoyable for my uncultured and underdeveloped mind. It lost it's shine the next year, however, when I came to the realization that it was, indeed, a fucking rodeo. He who increases knowledge, increases misery.

That's in the Bible. The Jewish part in the front, not the hippy Catholic part in the back.

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